Archive for July, 2009
How to solve Separation Anxiety with Your Kids
How to solve Separation Anxiety with Your Kids
Many children go through a phase in which they show anxiety and restlessness in the presence of unfamiliar people or situations. A baby may be unsettled by a new babysitter. A four year old may cry persistently during the first few days at kindergarten. These are perfectly normal situations and reactions.
One in every 25 children experiences some form of separation anxiety which can often be allayed by allowing the child to have a period of adjustment to his new situation. However, a child five or older who demonstrates unremitting resistance to camp, school or daycare for an extended period of time (3 weeks or more) may be suffering from separation anxiety disorder.
What is Separation Anxiety Disorder?
This is a condition in which the child becomes physically agitated over the thought of being separated from his primary caregiver or home. It is not confined to children. Adults can experience separation anxiety as well; it is known as “agoraphobia,” or fear of being separated from a safe person or home. “Agora” in Greek means marketplace and the word “agoraphobic” refers to people who are terrified of leaving home for the market.
What are the Symptoms of Separation Anxiety Disorder?
- The child complains of headaches or stomach aches. Sometimes he or she throws temper tantrums.
- The child has an irrational fear that something bad will happen if she leaves the house or caregiver.
- The child shows unusual concern about being kidnapped or taken away.
- The child fears that the caregiver might die.
- The child fears being alone, even in a separate room.
- The child has nightmares of being separated.
- The child cannot fall asleep unless caregiver is nearby.
What Can Be Done about Separation Anxiety Disorder?
If the child’s anxiety is so excessive it interferes with normal functioning at home and at school, it is wise to consult professional help. Cognitive Behavioral Therapies provide a framework in which children can learn about their fears and how to deal with them.
In essence, Cognitive Behavioral Therapies help children identify negative thoughts rather than external events, as the source of anxious feelings and behavior. They also help children develop skills for self reliance and self help. They help them practice alternative responses to anxiety so that new neural pathways can replace old circuitry in the brain. Achievement of goal is predicated on the children’s ability to unlearn old patterns and replacing them with new responses.
Why is Professional Treatment important?
Research suggests that anxiety disorders in children should be taken seriously and that parents should seek professional treatment because untreated children usually perform poorly at school, have repeated absences from school, experience problems relating with peers and siblings or become alcohol or drug dependent when they grow older.
Bianca Tora is a writer interested in the relationship between lifestyle and the brain, specifically the area of emotional regulation and control. She has published a book on anger management for children. Visit her at http://www.help-your-child-with-anger.com
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Effect Of Single Parenting On A Child
Let us start on the good effects of being a single parent. As an effect of being a single parent, you will be very close to your child or children. You will be the only one they will look up to and you will have their undivided …
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Anything and everything on raising a child, from one parent to another.
Workout with the kids
Workout with the kids
Many fathers live a well-rounded healthy lifestyle with regular workouts that involve their kids. First-time dads who think a new baby will interfere with their exercise schedule need not sacrifice their workouts but do need to supplement their parenting skills to include exercising with their kids. The trick here is to come up with kid-friendly routines. These routines are equally rewarding and also help in establishing healthy habits among children.
In an interview to the Associated Press, Heidi Hill, author of Fit Family: The Infant, Toddler and Preschool Years (Vitesse, 2008) explains how parents can hike, bike, run, and even kayak with their kids. Heidi and her husband, Tom have put this into practice by trying out many of these sports with their two daughters, aged 3 and 5 each. ”At the get-go, a lot of it can be miserable. You really have to persevere and know that you’re teaching a lifestyle.”, says Hill.
In the beginning, dads could try to fast walk with a jog stroller or jog alongside their kids as they bike. The key lies in using the right equipment that is not too clunky. A trail-a-bike is a one-wheel option that can be attached to the back of dad’s bike.
Workouts are a great way for dads to bond with their kids. As kids grow older, the positive effects of having family workouts increases exponentially. Dads need to listen to some good parenting advice by self-educating themselves and planning the workout in advance to make the experience fun for the entire family.
Paul Banas is a founder of GreatDad.com. He writes articles on parenting, parenting skills, pregnancy and dads, parenting tips, baby names, baby rooms and many more topics related to dads.
Solving Teething Problems
Separation Anxiety in kids can be a real issue
Separation Anxiety in kids can be a real issue
Many children go through a phase in which they show anxiety and restlessness in the presence of unfamiliar people or situations. A baby may be unsettled by a new babysitter. A four year old may cry persistently during the first few days at kindergarten. These are perfectly normal situations and reactions.
One in every 25 children experiences some form of separation anxiety which can often be allayed by allowing the child to have a period of adjustment to his new situation. However, a child five or older who demonstrates unremitting resistance to camp, school or daycare for an extended period of time (3 weeks or more) may be suffering from separation anxiety disorder.
What is Separation Anxiety Disorder?
This is a condition in which the child becomes physically agitated over the thought of being separated from his primary caregiver or home. It is not confined to children. Adults can experience separation anxiety as well; it is known as “agoraphobia,” or fear of being separated from a safe person or home. “Agora” in Greek means marketplace and the word “agoraphobic” refers to people who are terrified of leaving home for the market.
What are the Symptoms of Separation Anxiety Disorder?
- The child complains of headaches or stomach aches. Sometimes he or she throws temper tantrums.
- The child has an irrational fear that something bad will happen if she leaves the house or caregiver.
- The child shows unusual concern about being kidnapped or taken away.
- The child fears that the caregiver might die.
- The child fears being alone, even in a separate room.
- The child has nightmares of being separated.
- The child cannot fall asleep unless caregiver is nearby.
What Can Be Done about Separation Anxiety Disorder?
If the child’s anxiety is so excessive it interferes with normal functioning at home and at school, it is wise to consult professional help. Cognitive Behavioral Therapies provide a framework in which children can learn about their fears and how to deal with them.
In essence, Cognitive Behavioral Therapies help children identify negative thoughts rather than external events, as the source of anxious feelings and behavior. They also help children develop skills for self reliance and self help. They help them practice alternative responses to anxiety so that new neural pathways can replace old circuitry in the brain. Achievement of goal is predicated on the children’s ability to unlearn old patterns and replacing them with new responses.
Why is Professional Treatment important?
Research suggests that anxiety disorders in children should be taken seriously and that parents should seek professional treatment because untreated children usually perform poorly at school, have repeated absences from school, experience problems relating with peers and siblings or become alcohol or drug dependent when they grow older.
Bianca Tora is a writer interested in the relationship between lifestyle and the brain, specifically the area of emotional regulation and control. She has published a book on anger management for children. Visit her at http://www.help-your-child-with-anger.com
Get your baby to stop crying with a pacifier
Who should stop the bullying
Who should stop the bullying
In his recent ABC news opinion column, “Want to Stop Bullies?” Lee Dye cites new studies that claim that:
- Girls are more likely than boys to intervene to stop bullying than boys are.
- Girls intervene more because they’re expected to by their parents, best friends and favorite teachers.
- Popular males are more likely to pick on weaker boys, while unpopular, weaker but aggressive boys are more likely to pick on girls.
Of course. So what? I’m glad Mr. Dye is speaking out and I share his desire to stop bullies and harassment, bullying and abuse in schools. The reason I’m sarcastic is that I think these studies, done by interviewing 269 middle school students in four schools in North Central Florida, are typical of the thought process and pseudo-scientific research that says that:
- If we knew more we could design better programs to stop bullies.
- There’s a simple formula, waiting to be discovered by further research that will tell us what to do so anyone, anywhere could use the blueprint and stop bullying in schools
- We can’t have successful anti-bullying programs until we have more research.
However, these assumptions are all false and this research adds nothing we didn’t already know. And the generalizations they’ve already come up with are contradicted by evidence from the recent suicide deaths of four girls in Schenectady, New York.
We already know that getting the kids involved in anti-bullying programs is critical. We already know that it’s crucial to teach children what to do when they are bystanders and see bullying. In order to incorporate that knowledge into anti-bullying programs, we don’t need to wait until there’s more pseudo-science research to prove that point.
In summary, we know that it’s everyone’s job to stop bullying in schools and everyone’s help is necessary, especially the kids. No one group can make a program work if the other members of the local community resist or are uncaring. The programs in New Hampshire are only the latest reports documenting what we know already.
Successful programs have the seven elements crucial to success:
- The programs specify acceptable and unacceptable behavior.
- Children are taught specifically what to do if they’re bullied or if they’re bystanders.
- The programs involve everyone – school board members, police, principals, teachers, administrative staff and bus drivers, the kids, and at least a vocal, core group of parents.
- Consequences are clear and effective action rapid.
- Courageous and proactive administrators, school principals and teachers.
- Kids are also trained at home not to bully and how to stop bullies.
- All steps are implemented simultaneously.
Anti-bullying laws are necessary to force reluctant or uncaring district administrators and principals to act. They’re also necessary to protect principals and teachers who do act from bullying parents who defend their little terrorists and threaten to sue the principal and school for harassing their little bully. That’s like in the Harry Potter series where Lucius Malfoy protects his vicious son, Draco.
The biggest problem in stopping bullies is not the lack of research about bullying: It’s the lack of skillful effort being put forth by the most caring people. At many schools, well-meaning principals and teachers need to join forces with a core group of parents to get programs in motion. At other schools, frustrated and angry parents need to rally other parents in order to force uncaring or cowardly school district administrators and principals to make effective school policies and then take act promptly and strongly.
Resources Cited: http://abcnews.go.com/Technology/DyeHard/Story?id=7517300&page=1
Ben Leichtling, Ph.D. is author of the books and CDs “How to Stop Bullies in Their Tracks,” “Parenting Bully-Proof Kids” and “Eliminate the High cost of Low Attitudes.” He is available for coaching, consulting and speaking. To find practical, real-world tactics to stop bullies and bullying at home, school, work and in relationships, see his web site and blog http://www.BulliesBeGoneBlog.com
How to give your baby pain relievers
Imparting Good Values
Imparting Good Values
Values are the principles you viewed to be right and important in life. One of the important areas which parents must look into when raising kids is the imparting of values to their children. Although it sounds easy but to effectively imparting your values to your children can be difficult and it needs a lot of patience and time. Parents have great effects on a child’s future lifestyle, so it will be wise to develop a positive lifestyle for your kids to follow.
So what should you be doing in order to effectively impart your values to your little ones?
1. Your children learn from you
To “do as I say and not as I do” doesn’t apply to the children of the modern world. It will only be smart to set good examples for your kids to follow because they love to learn from you. So do consider the values you will like to see in your children so that you can set an example for them to learn and follow.
For example, if you like to see politeness in your kids, you would need to display politeness when communicating with them or other people. You have to be a polite person before your child can follow your step.
Take another example; if you want your child to be humble, you would have to be humble yourself. You should not be displaying a sense of arrogance or feel too proud when dealing with people. Always eat your humble pie when you commit a mistake to show your humility. That way, they will learn from your value and follow the way you deal with things.
2. Praises means approvals
When your kids display positive behaviours, you should not forget to praise them. Praising is important because it is one of the more effective ways in which you can show your approval to them. Your children feel good and proud when they are praised by you and with such good feelings, they will want to behave positively again and again.
3. Learn from others
Whenever you see suitable situation, you can point out the positive behaviour or misdeed done to your children. Teach them the value of the good deeds done and hence, they can learn from others. There are actually a lot of such situations you can make use of. These examples can be from TV, newspaper or even when you are out shopping with them.
One important point to take note is that never compare your little ones with another child who have just did something good. If he or she is belittled by your comments, you will only cause negative effects on your child’s mind.
4. Get your children to help
I’ve seen parents stopping their child from helping with the house chores because they have a maid at home. Without having to help out in the house, their kid may grow up not knowing how to help others and expect everything to be prepared for him or her.
When children are given the chances to help out in the house, they will develop a sense of responsibility in them. With the ability to fulfill their responsibilities, they can grow up more confidently.
Imparting values can be simple when raising kids. As long as you know how to set examples, expose them to good and bad behaviours, teach and praise them, you will be able to impart your values to them easily.
Jeff Boo is an Educator with many years of teaching experience and a Father of a pair of twins. Both he and his wife are very experience in handling children If you are truly concern about your children’s learning journey, log on to http://www.essentialsforparents.com and sign up for your FREE instant access to the Children’s Resources Centre!
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